


To Give You No Pain

by somedayisours



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Character Study, Inner Dialogue, Internal Monologue, Magic, Mild Gore, Pre-Canon, Temporary Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-26
Updated: 2021-02-26
Packaged: 2021-03-17 20:54:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29723103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/somedayisours/pseuds/somedayisours
Summary: "He smears blood on Steve's lips when he kisses him afterwards, on his jaw." That first time.





	To Give You No Pain

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [crawl home](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8437627) by [biblionerd07](https://archiveofourown.org/users/biblionerd07/pseuds/biblionerd07). 



> Title from "A Horse With No Name" by America.
> 
> Originally posted this back in 2019 but took it down.

The tea tastes like dust in the air, like milk on the edge of spoiling, like the first sheet of fresh tobacco paper from the pack, there's even the tang of sweat lingering on his tongue, and a hundred other familiar impressions Bucky can't name. It's later when he suspects that maybe there'd been everything he'd ever tasted and would taste in his whole life on his tongue at that moment as he kissed his soul goodbye.

The flavour does not linger in his mouth and he can not find it in himself to mourn its absence. Because he thinks of Steve.

The old woman takes the cup back from his hands, careful that the two of them do not touch fingers.

"You know the words," She croons from across the table, but he can feel her hot breath on his ear. "You need just remind his heart. You are a strong boy, the blade will be unerring in your hand."

Some part of him, deep in his chest, knows the words she speaks are true, no matter how nonsensical they seem.

She pats his arm reassuringly, he doesn't think of how before she wouldn't touch him. "Go now, James, the body does not wait."

"Yes," He says dumbly, standing on unsteady legs that let him stumble back to Steve.

In Steve's mother's apartment he hesitates, the kitchen knife shaking in his hand as he looks at the pale body laid before him on the ground. It feels as if he is possessed as he divides chilled flesh. As if it were someone else cutting into Steve's skin, as if someone was guiding his hand through the strokes.

He peels back the tissue and cracks open the bones, he knows where the heart lays in this bloody cavity even if he can't see it. He's always known Steve better than he's known himself. It's no trouble to stick his face right in there, breathing onto the red organ that looks no different from anything else when drenched in blood and buried like it is. The kiss he presses then isn't something that needs to be done he knows, but it feels right. The blood on his lips tastes sweet.

The words fall from his mouth like he's spoken them before, like he's possessed.

" _Cease your wandering. It is I, whom you've chosen and who chooses you back. Come home to me._ "

He smears blood on Steve's lips when he kisses him afterwards, on his jaw.


End file.
